[If you’d rather read what I say in the video, you can read it below…]
Recently, I posted a simple three-word Facebook status update: “I was wrong.” Simple enough. But what does that mean? Wrong about what?
I originally posted that because I wanted it to pop up in my annual memory reminder. Of course no one knows what it means — I posted it for myself. I want it to be a reminder for myself every year. But after a few people sent me messages and asked me why I posted that, I have now decided that I probably should share it. I’m willing to bet it can do a lot of good for anyone who is listening to this video.
Back when I was about between the age of 16-19, I was an atheist and my worldview was much different than it is now. I believed myself to be someone special, unique, and unlike any other. I mean, I possessed life. I didn’t know why, but it was obviously because the universe thought I was amazing. I believed that I was someone of importance and I truly mattered and that soon, everyone will know that and will probably agree. I truly felt like I was one-of-a-kind and I felt like it was all about me. That’s how it was when I was young, I didn’t understand life, but I possessed life, and what do you do with that? What is your response to the knowledge that you possess life? Well, it was all about me. My life.
Well, recently, I have had the blessing — yes, you heard me correctly — blessing of my truck being smashed in an accident. How is that a blessing and what does it have to do with me being wrong?
I know someone— who shall remain nameless in order to protect identity. This certain someone has a daughter. The daughter has a friend. Both the daughter and her friend lied to me. They both told me the friend was old enough to drive and they even showed me some plastic that said “driver’s license” on it. And the picture on the plastic matched the friend. Okay. There’s a barcode on the back. The friend has a driver’s license.
A mistake on my part, I allowed the friend and the daughter to take my truck and travel what should have been a short distance to go get food for a group of us because not everyone in the group wanted to go. It seemed like a good and easy solution at the time. No one has to argue and fight about who is going, who is staying. The two go get food, bring it back to everyone, and everything is fine. Right? Wrong! So wrong! So very wrong!
The two ended up wrecking my truck. As it turns out, the friend did not actually have a driver’s license and they didn’t only drive a short distance to get the food and come back. No. Where they wrecked my truck was about a 20-minute drive away from where they should have been. But this is not why I wrote, “I was wrong.” Let me explain…
Because of the accident, I have to shell out an amount of money I don’t really care to pay. Let’s be honest. It wasn’t on my to-do list. But there’s a price that needs to be paid. Who is going to pay the price? Well, here’s my situation…
There is a lawyer who wants to fight for me on my behalf to make the parents of the daughter and the friend pay for for everything, including the deductible, the price of the rental car I’m currently using, and the depreciation that will inevitably be associated with my truck when I get it back. However, the parent of the daughter is a single parent. The parent of the friend is also a single parent.
But like I said, there’s a price that needs to be paid. Who is going to pay the price? Well, I have decided that I am going to give the gift of mercy to both the single parents, give the gift of grace to both the daughter and the friend, and I’m going to absorb the penalty. I’m going to pay the price. They did lie to me and did drive my truck where I never gave them permission to go. But I’m going to absorb the penalty and pay the price as an act of love. I’m not going to punish the parents because of their children. And I also want this to become a life lesson for the daughter and the friend that they will hopefully never forget. I want them to know how powerful forgiveness is and how grace can set people free.
But I also wanted them to know and to think about how living a life of lies and selfish behavior can ruin the lives of other people. I want them to know that what they did was wrong and that they could have been killed in the accident and could have even killed the 8-year old boy in the other vehicle that was involved in the accident. I want them to know that they have been blessed with grace and they need to be grateful. I want them to know that lying about having a driver’s license and taking my truck for a joy ride to go somewhere I never gave them permission to go could easily have landed them in prison or the grave. Unlike many people who are rotting behind bars, they get a second chance to live life right. And the parents have already told me that they are going to make their children work to pay me back. And that’s a good life lesson. I’m all for people dealing with the consequences of their choices. So, if they pay me back, okay.
It is important that we learn from mistakes in life. I learned yet another lesson. Unfortunately, it’s one that I’ve already learned before multiple times. It just happens to be with a new person every time. I learned that even if I truly believe that someone loves me, that person might still lie to me and use me to get what they want. I didn’t think it would happen to me this time. Not with this person. Not with five years of history. I believed this person loved me enough not to lie to me. But sadly, I had to learn the lesson the hard way yet again. Pain and suffering is always possible in a world where free will exists. But free will is the only way a loving relationship can be authentic and meaningful.
But through all my pain and sadness that someone I knew and loved would lie to me and use me, I also learned another valuable lesson about grace.
If they pay me back the money, then okay. But it doesn’t need to be immediately paid back either. I’m not going to hard press them for money. In fact, if they decide later on not to pay me back, I’m not going to hunt them down. They’re going to have to be accountable for their choices sooner or later. Through this incident, GOD reminded me of how many times GOD had given me the gift of grace when I didn’t deserve it. I’ve done some things that if not just as bad, then they were worse. The difference between me and the daughter/friend is that I never got caught. But on the cross, Jesus paid the price of my sins even though He was innocent and didn’t deserve to absorb the penalty. Jesus gave me the gift of grace when I didn’t deserve it. Why would I not also show that same love to someone else?
And that’s why I decided to absorb the cost and pay the price for what the daughter and the friend did mainly for the sake of the single parents, but to also give the daughter and the friend an opportunity for a second chance.
When I wrote that “I was wrong” in my Facebook status update, I meant that I was wrong when I had once believed that it’s all about me. It’s not. In fact, love is about others, not self.
“By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.”
(1John 3:16) -ESV
“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.”
(John 15:13) -ESV
In Matthew 18:21-35, Jesus tells the parable of the king forgiving and excusing a large debt of a servant. And the servant was expected to do the same for others. I was that servant who had been forgiven and cleared of my huge debt of sin. I was given the gift of grace. And Jesus expects me to do the same for others. How could I possibly hard press the parents for a debt when my true debt was paid by the blood of Christ? How dare I go after them with revenge in mind when GOD calls us to chase after people in love? If you don’t know what Jubilee is, I challenge you to look it up in Leviticus, chapter 25.
“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.”
(Matthew 6:24) -ESV
I love GOD and I love people. I don’t serve money. Money’s not my GOD.
By choosing to give the gift of mercy to the parents and the gift of grace to the daughter and the friend, I will at worst lose a truck and money. But sacrifice is oftentimes required to love someone. Plus, my GOD is greater than my problem and GOD will restore anything I lose while choosing to serve GOD and love others. I choose to give the gift of grace and I challenge you to do the same. I was wrong — it’s not about me. Are you making life all about you?
Quest For Truth 